The Myth of Negative Emotions
What does it mean to live?
To zero in on the answer to that question will drive the very change we all seek: to be more satisfied with life; our life, the one we currently have.
In short, life is energy. Without energy, there is no life. Therefore, life — in all its forms — is nothing more than the channeling of energy in whatever way defines the type of life it is.
To be human means to channel energy through the expression of emotion; the less emotion we express, the less alive we are.
The undeniable nature of human emotions is that they are unknown and unknowable until the moment they occur; as a response to some environmental stimulus. That stimulus may include the environment of our own thoughts, but how that energy wants to be expressed is entirely unique to each of us (though there are many similarities), and unknowable until they actually occur.
This means that we must accept — in advance of their actual emergence — the energy of our emotions before they occur, and regardless of the form they may take and the experience they create.
To do anything else is to be less human.
So, if emotions are life itself, and the acceptance of them is the acceptance of ourselves, where did this notion of “negative emotions” come from?
It comes from a failure to understand one of the basic tenets of being human and, most likely, of embracing life of all kinds.
This tenet has been called The Greatest Lesson by philosopher Alan Watts: it is the understanding that life — like all energy — is made up of ebb and flow, highs and lows, peaks and valleys, and all other characterizations of the nature of energy.
Imagine an ocean with no waves, and you have imagined life with no emotion.
Emotions are realized in many ways; some cause elation, others tears. But the elation is not possible without the tears, and vice versa. If you suppress one, you suppress both. Therefore, the tears must be welcomed and cherished equally with the elation because they both contain the same value for life.
Life does not afford us the option of picking and choosing the way emotions want to be expressed. That is just the nature of life. And, that is why it is The Greatest Lesson.
Yet, in practice we try to eliminate the emotions we would not have chosen, and allow only those which we would. So, we label those which we would not choose as “negative”, and promote those which we would choose as “positive”. We believe that success in life means we are entitled to experience those emotions which we would choose, and only those.
This destructive mindset is being promoted in some of the highest circles of psychology and personal development, but it contradicts the very nature of life. And, the only result of it is that we become less human, and live lesser lives.
This belief that life “should” contain only the highs — and never the lows — is the direct result of a logical mindset. Our culture romanticizes logic, and considers the expression of emotion to be a sign of weakness and confusion. Logic’s only purpose is to eliminate threats to our existence.
The only real distinction here is the one between life and fear. So much of what we call “negative emotion” is nothing more than a reaction to some perceived and illusory threat. We do, rightfully, seek to eliminate fear from our lives because — in the context of life — there is no such thing as fear. Fear is always a creation of the mind.
Fear — and its attendant logic — is the root cause of all dysfunction and the destruction of life. All violent and otherwise destructive behavior is the direct result in the belief of an illusory fear. Without exception.
The conclusion of all of this is that fear is NOT an emotion. To subject emotions to same process as the elimination of fear — as something “negative” — is to suppress life itself. And, then, wonder why we experience so much division, dysfunction, drama and pain.
There is one fool-proof method for identifying this distinction: fear causes you to withdraw; to suppress energy. In short: fear separates you from emotion, and that feels bad. Emotions cause you to release energy. In short: emotions put you in touch with energy, and that feels good.
Considering the above, if you believe the tears to be a “negative emotion”, remember the notion of “a good cry”. We’ve all had one, and we all know how that feels. It is good because of the energy it releases, the clarity of thought that it produces, and the satisfaction of being authentic.
(Emotions) are energy taking you on the wonderful journey called “your life”
This also means that emotions will never deceive you or lead you astray. It is energy taking you on the wonderful journey called “your life”. Life is an adventure. And, like all adventures, it includes that which we would choose, and that which we would not.
The lesson is to soundly reject the suggestion that there is such a thing as a “negative emotion” that we must work to eliminate from our lives. That is a logical, but misguided and unenlightened, view of life. I promise that rejecting that notion will — without fail — bring you closer to the life you desire.
Because desire itself is an unknown and unknowable emotion until it is actually experienced.
